one for keeps

http://moreintelligentlife.com/story/david-foster-wallace-in-his-own-words

this one's for keeps!

:)

all my Hamsap friends, Just wanna let you girls know. you all crossed my mind very often and that always put a smile on my face!! :) This is specially for my dearests :)

love you

http://youtu.be/0put0_a--Ng

i don't know why but this song reminded me of all of you,

know that i love you all very much :)

life is precious

hello all my dear friends:)

how are all of you doing? i have been following doctor vagus's blog-http://doctorslife.blogspot.com/ for some time. and I came across this story of his buddy- Dr tow shung tan who is fighting cancer. So i started to follow this doctor's blog too-http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/towshungtan. and i have to be frank, I am touched whenever i read his blog. He is such a wonderful person:)i guess u must be thinking I am insane, come on, i do not even know this person!but zhabor-men, pls visit the blog if u have time.

Today, i was informed by mail that there was an important post-it was from his wife saying he has left us peacefully. I felt the pain really.

Life is precious!:)Enjoy life to the fullest ok:)Love all of u:)

LOVE

My dear friends, this simple sentence which primary kid may aware of strucked me, or put it in another way, enlightened me today :)

I came across with this conversation about a married guy telling the counsellor how he does not love his wife anymore and the wife doesn't love him either. They just don't have the feelings for each other which they used to have. They have 3 kids and he doesn't know how to deal with it..

The counsellor answered: " Love her.."

The man said:" You don't understand.. I told you, the love just isn't there anymore.."

Counsellor replied: "Then love her, If the feeling isn't there, that's a good reason to love her"

" But how do you love when you don't love?"

"My friends, love is a verb. Love ~the feeling~ is a fruit of love , the verb. So love her. Serve her. Listen to her. Understand her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?"

I have always been aware of how important love is to me. It is somthing deep down I somehow know I cannot live without. Coming from a blessed background with loving family and friends, I have always believed that love conquers all.. Whenever there is negative emotion such as anger or jealousy, I tell myself this " Let love be the strongest emotion.." It has been a value I live upon...

But as I grow up, especially after some relationships that didn't work out. I questioned myself. I wonder what hold 2 people together for a life time. Is that the feeling of love? But my experience told me, no matter how charming love can be.. Feeling does come and it does go... Love becomes something I know I cann't afford to lose, yet it is also something that I feel very insecure about..

And today I understand why. It is because of my interpretation of love.. For the first half our lives, we tend to be recepients in this world.. We are taken care by older people, we are taught by teachers, we are fed and loved by family. We receive love.. So love is an emotion, a feeling, a noun.. Love is what you feel. and it makes you feel good..

but for the 2nd half of our lives, perhaps love should be a verb.. To love is to understand, to take action, to care, to give, to protect...

I have been holding on to the feeling too much.. afraiding to lose it as I grow older.. Only today I understand what I should focus is actually the verb part; the part which is actually under my control..

I am not sure if it make sense to you guys.. but It has changed my entire view of this question that has been puzzled me for very long.. Love is not something you hold on, It is something you act on..

Love is a verb :)

HALO HALO Hamsapers!

I didn't noticed that there were so many post recently and i missed all of them!

As always, it's so full of inspiration and motivation. =)

I wish i can write as well as these, and can spread the motivated-spirit around but I'm quite bad in that. At least not in words.

Just wanna say,

I miss everyone. U all stay in my little heart. xiao shi xiao xin. =)

Have a great day ya, ?

something for you guys :)

:)

this is stuck on my wall during eos preparation! may all of us stay strong in whatever situations!

haloooo zabor-men!! now we have two zabors in US, three in UK and i am here in hamyu land!:) i guess absence makes the heart grow fonder, i must have been missed ;p

anyway, i was just reflecting, how time flies. it was just one year ago that we stepped into seremban clinical school. one year. so much i have learnt. like what wheiying said, the lecturers are really like our parents, guiding us this one year. i am thankful for each of them, the advices, the scoldings, the sarcasm.

i read in one book that, teaching medicine is merely a secondary objective of academic staff, their primary duty is to become the role models for all the medical students.

i agree with that totally! i guess in medical school, it is not only important for us to gain medical knowledge, we must also learn how to be a doctor. one lecturer whom i really respect a lot shared with me during my 10mins OSCE break. he said, doctrine, is part of a doctor. it means, as a doctor, you must always teach. its part of hippocrates oath too i think.

my obstetrics examiner said to me, 'this exam will not kill you, but you will kill the patient next time, if you are not competent' . so true. i was hit badly after my obstetrics clinical exam just before eos, but it is also this same force which push me to work harder. it makes me believe, everything really happened for a reason.

and more often, it's not the events of our lives that shape us, but our beliefs as to what those events means. - quoted from anthony robbins.

so yup, hope we can all stay strong and continue this fight to achieve our dreams. no matter how far you are, you know you always have your family and friends here back home to support you. jiayou all hamsappssss! :)

SWEET REMINDER AGAIN

A few hours later, our beloved Wheiying is gonna fly fly fly fly fly to US :) haha feel very comforting knowing that you will be a few thousand miles near us, and even more happy knowing that you are going to meet another hamsap- Queen! :)

Admire your courage.. admire your determination.. and above all.. just wanna let you know we love you just the way you are Wheiying..

All hamsapers, I always feel that no matter what seasons of life, or what weathers are there outside, I always feel very rich in heart .. because I have friends like you all :)

EOS 7

phew!finally eos 7 is over:) and i want to share with all my zabors what i have learnt from it:

1. When i sat for my osce and saw all the lecturers, suddenly i felt so touched and grateful. They have taught me so much for the past one year with humility. They are like our parents in medical field, moulding us to be the good,competent doctors.

2. Health is so important. I fell sick and lost my voice few days before osce. I realised no matter how prepared u are, if u cannot talk, u are going to fail.Thank god i gained my voice before exam:)

3. Family and friends kept me going. I think the CNY break which was part of the study break is a blessing in disguise.This is because i think i gained so much strengh and energy from the good food, gathering and family time. Another fuel for me is friend. I enjoyed having discussion and practicing osce with them, and learn together. I know that i am not alone:)

4. There will be many exams in my life. I will need to be able to handle all the exam stress well. If not i will be stressed for my whole life.

5. Enjoy the exam and thank the exam. I always feel i have grown a little bit more after each exam:)

Strepsils from Kai Rou which treats more than the throat:)

Siew Hoon with the "testis and penis" :p we are doing examination for inguinal hernia.

hoho,i shall go and sleep now!:)i miss all of u:)

Vavavavavavalentine's!

Valentine's day is just another sweet day to express my love to all my laokongs and laopaos! Thank you for your presence in my life :) I smile cause I know I m in love with YOU!

kiss kiss hugs hugs! haha

学医的美丽

这几天遇见了几位癌症病人。有一些在奋斗着，有一些只是在数日子。坦白说，那些prognosis 并不乐观的病人，气色看起来其实还不错。可是很多过往的案例都对他们的一年生存机会判了残忍的数字。一个健康的人却清楚地知道自己时间不多，最令人难受的是，你会看着自己的身体状况一天一天地退步，直到你走的那一天。医生最无奈的莫过于告诉一个病人，他们手上的治疗选择已用完了。

在这里，当一切可能的疗法都已尝试了，一个癌症病人的最后选者是palliative care（尽可能地减低痛苦）或 clinical trial （尝试还在研究着的药）, 昨天我看见的第一个老伯伯尝试了clinical trial, 他觉得自己很幸运因为非常难得的，他尝试的药品尽然非常适合他，并给了他非常美好的一年。（在癌症科里，每一个小小的进步都是非常激励人心。这跟妇产科不一样，妇产科是不可以有错误的因为大家expect的都是母子平安）可是再好的药已不是神丹。老伯伯的病情在这个月开始恶化了，并已扩散至脊椎。他告诉我们上个星期的他还可以驾车，这个星期的他只能靠轮椅才能行动。上个星期买的球赛门票也得换成轮椅座位，看完球赛的当晚就得马上回医院。
当我检查他的腿时，很多知觉与脚力都已经因为癌细胞压着神经线而渐渐失去了。接下来被影向的可能是膀胱功能。你可能不相信这位老伯伯的气色是多么的红润，多么的健谈。可是内心的挣扎是其他人无法了解的。

接下来看到的老婆婆的情况又不一样，身上扎满了三四种点滴。因为得了肠癌，所以已经6个星期没有吃过一餐，所有的养分都来自于点滴。在化疗的副作用下，头发也开始减少了。但她穿着的是shocking pink 的浴袍，其实挺可爱的. 虽然看起来并不像刚才的老伯伯那么有气色，但我们清楚她的病情是比较乐观的。医生给予的化疗是比较多，那是因为知道这场病战是有胜率的。老婆婆的斗志力来自于她的孩子，她的目标是在六月份时出席她女儿的婚礼。我问了化疗的副作用还可以应付吗？她勇敢的大声回应：“Bring it on！ I will fight it, I will fight for my children" 。临走前，我看到的不是一个被癌症折磨得病人，而是一个fighter! :)

走出病房前，隔壁床的病人竟忽然拉着我们几位学生道谢。谢谢所有人在她患病时给予的照顾。她告示我们她无法想象以前的癌症病人是多么的可怜。一个患癌的人尽然告诉我她觉得她很幸运，很幸运现在的医疗设备很完善，很感谢拥有一群照顾他们的医疗人员。那一杀那，我知道那份致谢并不属于我的，因为我只是路过的学生，可是我还是深深地被她感动了。感动在于那份人与人之间的简单，感动在于medicine那份简单的美丽。在与病癌对抗时，很多时候我么都输了。可能我们打不赢那癌细胞，可是那份真诚的caring,那份一起走过的努力，那一份感动却是我们的收获.

你知道吗？当我们在抱怨上个星期都过得太累或太无聊时，有一些人的上个星期却是他永远都回不去的，因为癌细胞用一个星期的时间拿走了他的一切。

当我们在抱怨自己的居住环境不好，房间不够理想时，有一人在很努力地用照片卡片布置她的病床，因为医院是她的第二家。

当我们在抱怨没胃口或食物不好吃时，有一个人在非常非常地珍惜着她那一个月以来的第一口汤， 因为她那前四个星期的养分都来自于点滴。

我也有抱怨的时候。有时候觉得医学要懂的学问太多，有时觉得何苦选这一科啊？为什么不选一个责任没这么大或比较有趣的行业。

我还是有很多不懂与懊恼的时候，可是我希望我可以记得学医的美丽在于那份朴素。当你回到生命最根本的时候，你学会了谦虚。因为学医，我有机会亲眼看到并感受到生命最初的感动。有些人要付出很大的代价才体验到，我很感恩医学给我上的这一堂课，那可能是生命里最重要的一堂课。

新年快乐

FOOD :DD


with lots of


JIA YOU!